Investing In Yourself: The Hows and The Whys

Reading Time: 12 minutes

Do you invest? Maybe in a little here and a little there. You have a few shares in an index fund or maybe a lot of shares in some tech industry. If so, good! That isn’t the investment I am talking about this week. We are talking about investing not in socks but something that will generate more value in the near and long term. That investment is in yourself. Do you invest in yourself?

Yes investing in of all things, yourself. I know it sounds weird and that is because we have been taught that spending money on ourselves is somehow selfish. The truth in the matter is that is the farthest thing from the truth.

There is a need to invest in ourselves and so many times we don’t. We spend money on ourselves, but not for any return. I would like to see if I can convince you to start investing not in stocks but yourself.

Why invest in yourself?

There are several reasons to invest in yourself. Ranging from you will more likely have a return on your investment to becoming the person you envisioned when you were younger. It was nice when we could see ourselves as the next Indiana Jones or maybe you thought that Andrew Carnegie was someone to look up to. Maybe you wanted to be batman. Whatever it was, we had a vision of who we wanted to be, and as we got older we had external influences who convinced us to squash that dream.

Because we took that old dream and stored it away because we were told that it wasn’t practical or you couldn’t make any money at it, we stopped aiming for that dream. Because we were not trying, we stopped pursuing it. 

reading is one of the classic ways you can invest in your betterment

Many men just accept their life as is. They don’t see a reason to improve their standing, and that is sad in my view. Men are at their happiest when they are striving for something new. The rewards of taking in some knowledge and then applying it only to see it work are simply awe-inspiring.

So if you are thinking of investing in yourself, why?

More likely to get a return on that investment.

The reason many people invest because they want a return on that investment. That is why we invest in stocks. Because when the stocks do good we are making money. Yet sometimes those stocks do perform as well and we lose money. That is how all investment works, and it can happen with investing in yourself. You may invest a small fortune in yourself only to find out that you are not interested in that field. It sucks that is true but it is a possibility.

Yet you are the main factor for that return if you invest in yourself. With stocks and other investments, you have less control over what is being done. You may have a CEO in a COmpany be found to have some huge scandal. Look at Enron and their cooking their books. The investors didn’t have any control. They were along for the ride.

Investing in yourself allows you more control
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If you invest in yourself you have control. You are relying on you to perform the way you need to perform. If you don’t then you may lose that money. The only person you can blame for losing that money is you. So as a means to not lose that money you will be more likely to apply the knowledge you are acquiring towards your goal.

The money you sink into that project suddenly isn’t just buying something it is investing in your future. Your personal future. It not only financial gain you receive but mental strength alongside confidence you never thought possible.

You have Skin in the game.

Why do you want to add money to your personal growth? That is because you now have something to be accountable for. Many times if you are a part of a free online class you may do the lessons and even learn a few things but if you add money to the equation you are going to want to extrude some value from what you are getting. 

Yeah, sometimes that investment can be costly, and when it is, you are wanting to make darn sure that you are getting something for the amount of money you are putting. That is that return I was talking about. So yeah you can learn something from a free webinar but if you can have a webinar that has a fee you will also get more value from that.

invest in what you are interested in

That is because often the webinar host will want to make sure you are getting more information. After all, you have paid. They want to make sure they earned the money the attendees are paying. They have to make it worth the attendee’s time and money. If not then their business will not stay open for long. 

When you introduce money into the equation the value of the product goes up. So if you want better information and more instruction then find that webinar or conference that is charging something. Because when you both have skin in the game you are more likely to get that return.

You are more compelled to get out of your comfort zone.

When you are investing in yourself and you have laid down your hard-earned cash you want that value that is promised. To get that value you are often required to do the very thing that has held you back. To get to the new level you are after you have to get uncomfortable. As I have mentioned before discomfort is where the growth happens. I

If you are about to lose some money though you are more likely to stay accountable for your investment and so you will take that tentative step out into the uncomfortable unknown. Money has a lot of power and the ability to get you out into the unknown is one of the best because it was your choice to invest in yourself.

You Gain a Better perspective.

Because money pushes you to get out of your comfort zone you grow and gain a better perspective of what you can do and where you need to go. You find that those scary places that you go into are just in your mind and that perspective of it being in your head is one of the most valuable perspectives you can gain. 

The perspective on why you are doing something is also gained. You find that you have more abilities and the confidence that you gain is an invaluable return on your personal investment. 

Blowing Your Own Damn Mind

Have you ever blown your own mind to what you can do? No? Have you ever tried to do it? When you invest in yourself and you see what you can do you will see that you are blowing your hair back regularly. 

All it takes is the dedication to invest in yourself. Make a plan for your money and then work that plan suddenly you find yourself in awe of what you just accomplished. You can do that without spending money but the time it takes is so much longer and more arduous.

To make those big discoveries happen faster when you pay for someone to help you. You listen more intently and you practice what is asked of you, because of the money you invested in your improvement. Therefore if you want to blow your own mind about how much is possible, Invest in yourself.

Expand Your Beliefs

We all have a set of beliefs. Beliefs being a thought we perceive to be true. Yet many times our beliefs are wrong and they hold us back. We may believe that we can only make $50,000 a year. Because of that thought, we don’t ever get any higher. That belief is what is holding us back. It is causing us to not even try to get a bigger slice.

Yet if you invest in yourself you will find that it is possible and often encouraged to go against that belief. You Change what you are telling yourself so that you are in a few years bringing in a lot more zeros into your account. All because as you gain more knowledge you will start to see the faults in your belief system

Maybe you have the belief that you are a crappy parent. Well, that belief can be changed you can see that you’re a great parent and you don’t have to worry about your kids quite as much as you did. There are many different beliefs, that can be changed by investing in yourself.

You can get out of that rut you are in.

Like beliefs, you may find yourself in a rut. You are stuck. You find yourself in the same position no matter what you try. Well, often that is a combination of belief systems you have in your head and the fact that you are trying to go at your goal by yourself. 

Many times if you re wanting to get out of a rut you need to Jerk the wheel. Yeah, It’s rough and can at times get scary but that only lasts a short while and you are above the ruts you were stuck in. Investing in yourself and the person who is helping you is a huge jerk of the wheel.

green leaf tree surrounded by green grass field
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Why do we not invest in ourselves?

People don’t invest in themselves for a wide range of different reasons from fear to self-worth.


This is the biggest reason most men stay small. We are afraid of what we may do. When we don’t know the outcome men will try to play it safe. There is an aversion to risk. Yet if you take to time to put in the extra effort, the people around you will notice. 

Men at times will also fear what others will think and if we stand out we will be cut down like a tall poppy. People fear that their friends will change. The good part is that they will. Not for the worst as many people think but for the better. Your scarcity mindset is working when you believe that people who are mooching are going to be the only friends you have the more you stand out. Yet those people are the ones that actually will peel away from your life as you stand out more.

Fear is what protects us and keeps us safe. Yet sadly you can’t gather food when you are just staying in the cave. You have to leave and go out into the world if you want to succeed and bring home food. So that discomfort you feel is your courage, your insight, your perspective, and you as a whole person is getting stretched and growing.

The Cost of the Investment

This sort of ties in with fear but the cost of the investment can also hold people back from even doing small investments into themselves. They may have a scarcity mindset on money and not think they cant gather together the funds needed for an event they would like to attend or they may fear that they won’t be able to recoup the cost of that event if do attend. Yet there are other costs associated with improving yourself that people do not account for.

The amount of time or committing any time can hold a person back. We don’t have the ability yet to jack into our minds and download the knowledge and skills needed for the next step in your growth. So the work that is involved also has time as a cost. 

TIme can be a bit scary because it is our only true nonrenewable resource. Once it is spent it is gone. For that very reason, I would say that is why you need to spend it. You cant save it up. You only have now and the past is irretrievable. So, spend that time on making yourself better. Take that time and grow better with each passing second.

How to invest in yourself

There are many ways you can invest in yourself. Some cost lots of money others are a small fraction of your resources. Some are better and some help in very small increments. The amount you invest depends on the amount of return you are looking for.

Time Investments

There are several ways you can invest in yourself and they do not have to cost any money, only your time. While your time can be used well. Remember that with any of these it does you no good unless you apply that knowledge you have gained. If you just learn and do the practical then did you learn it?


These are great free resources that you can turn to for insights and mindset shifts. The great thing about these is that yeah they may take time to listen to them you can speed your podcast player up and listen at 1.5x or even 2x speed. SO an hour podcast can last only 30 minutes. You can also listen to podcasts while doing other things, like the dishes or driving to work. ZIg ZIgglar used to call it Automobile University. 

To find a good podcast just do a search for whatever topic you are interested in learning about All you have to do is open your Apple Podcasts app on your iPhone, or grab Google Podcasts if you are on an Android Device. 

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Books From the Library

You can also grab a book from the library and read from the knowledge of other men. This is a good way to get the books but I will be mentioning books in the paid section to and though you can get the same books I do recommend that you buy the books for several reasons the biggest is that you have skin in the game.

Attend free workshops

With the whole Wuhan Flu mess going on many people have discovered that Zoom and other similar platforms allow them to help more people than doing in-person workshops. You can learn quite a bit from these online gatherings.  The drawback is that again you don’t have skin in the game and though the host wants to make sure they help you you will get more help from a paid workshop.

Money Investments

Now for the investments that you will have to shell out not only time but your hard-earned cash. I have mentioned earlier that there are many advantages to spending money to get yourself better and why investing in yourself reaps such better rewards. So what are some ways you can invest time and money into becoming a better and more successful man?

Buy Books

man in black suit reading book
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

First off books are a treasure trove of knowledge. People pour their hearts and souls into writing books laying out the book in a way that will be the best in helping the reader in whatever task they are facing.

Yet you can get books for free and that can be good if you truly don’t have any money to spend but libraries often will have the great books out on loan and so you won’t be able to get them when you need them and also there is that lack of skin in the game.

When you buy a book it is yours. This means you can write your thoughts in the margins you can highlight inspiring examples for what you are needing to do. You can do a lot with a purchased book that you aren’t able to do when you borrow a book from someone or a library.

There is also the psychological effect that you spend money on that book so you want to get some value from it. Why buy a book if you aren’t going to read it?

Attend Workshops

If you can attend a workshop. These are gatherings both online and offline that allow you to get a more focused dose of knowledge. You often will find that they throw so much information that it can even be a bit overwhelming. Yet you often have access to the host and you can ask them questions and with the host getting paid for your attending they want to make sure they provide as much value as possible so that you might want to get a higher level product.

Join a Men’s Group

These are sometimes referred to as Masterminds, but whatever you want to call them they are incredible for helping you smash a learning curve. There are several elements to a men’s group that help you excel at your goals faster than going at it alone. 

The big one is the accountability element. You develop a friendship with the men in your group and you don’t want to let them down. So when something is asked of you or you promise that you are going to do something you are more likely going to do it.

You also get a clearer sight of what you are facing when you work in a men’s group. If you share a problem you are having there is a good chance that someone in the group has had the same issue in their journey and they can offer advice.

Now you can find free ones out there and they are just as powerful as the others when you have everybody show up. That is the problem with the free versions of these. You don’t feel as committed to going as you would if you paid for the group. It’s not that the free is worse it’s just you will have people who only show up from time to time. While you are going to have people in the paid groups showing up consistently because they have invested money into the group and want to get as much value as they can from it.

If you are interested in joining a men’s group the Brotherhood Of Men has some openings 

Take a Class

Whether it is an online class or in a physical classroom. Take a class and see what you can learn from there. There are some great free classes but the better ones do have a fee attached to them. 

These classes can be anything from The Masterclass Series which are done by the true masters of their art, to UDemy, or Lynda.com. You can also attend college classes on a particular topic. Normally these cost money and you don’t get any certificate but you can also go for a full college accreditation if it will help you in your goals. It is learning and that is the best thing for you to grow.


Now if you want to really add some rocket fuel to your journey and jump ahead of your competitors. Get a coach, there are coaches that cover every aspect of a person’s life. From dating to marriage, Kids to business coaching. There are coaches that can help you get a business started or how to sell a business. Coaches have a way of cutting through the fluff we generate and see what the root of the problem is and call you out on any BS you are telling you and get you on the path you truly want to be on.

All you have to do is google your block and coach, I bet your dollars to doughnuts that something will show up, fitted just for you.

If you are looking at finding your path and how you can fit masculinity into your life so that you can be the leader your son is needing then The Relaxed Male can help you.

No matter how you go about it we all have a journey against fear and what we don’t know. Some tools can help you get further down the road and closer to your dreams. Be it from books or hiring a coach, if you’re willing to invest in yourself and get out of your comfort zone you will find that there is very little is holding you back.

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About Bryan Goodwin

I like being able to help people find their "why" and achieve the personal freedom they desire. Besides writing for Relaxed Male I also am a life coach. By helping men find the leader that is found in each and every one of us. I do this by encouraging men to get outdoors and find the balance they are missing. Realize that they need to be in contact with the outside as often as they can. It is not only good for them but for their families and relationships.

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