Question of the week by Brotherhood of Men
Well, there are a few points that can help you stop getting angry all the time. The first, is to know what is the opposite of love? It’s not anger nor is it often thought of as being hate. The true opposite of love is fear. Fear destroys while love builds.
The second is nobody can do anything emotionally to you. They can not make you mad. They cant make you happy. They cant make you nervous. All these emotions you feel come from one thing a thought you had.
Now you may have been in a situation that created a thought that generated a particular emotion. The solution is simple but it takes a lot of practice. Start paying attention to what you are thinking. Look at and try to understand what thoughts you have under different circumstances. If you are having trouble with this and you are always jumping to something in your past you may want to see a counselor, to address why past thoughts are your go-to response.
Many times when you do “thought work” realize what thought is causing the anger you cant start working on changing that thought and trying to examine the why around that thought. You can see that there are other ways to approach that same circumstance and they can also be very positive.
If you find that you are taking minor actions and comments and making them mean something personal and getting angry that way. Then you can seek out a coach or someone of that nature so they can help you with your thought work.
There are a few ways you can mitigate anger when you are in the moment that you find yourself getting worked up over something.
- Take a step back
- deep breathes
- talk to a friend
Changing your overall mindset is also something that can help with your anger issues.
Exercise, not just a push-up or two but get into physical exercise like JuJitSu some type of controlled violence. If you don’t have anything like that around you then find a good 50 lbs rock and story throwing it up and down your yard. Run bleachers but do it aggressively.
Each morning or each evening write down 5 things you are grateful for. This helps change your mind from a scarcity mindset to an abundant mindset. People with abundant mindsets see the world as an opportunity and not as a wasteland. So it is harder for them to want to waste energy on something like getting angry.
Stop watching the news
The biggest cause of anger for the world. They write to keep you watching or reading, it is not for your benefit it is for theirs. You can still find out what happening around you without FOX or MSNBC barking at you to be outraged at everything idiots we elected are doing.
This is a huge one. If you have a purpose you will not want to waste all of your time and energy on frivolous emotions like anger. You have a mountain to climb and you are the only person who can do it.
Do words have power?
Sort of but not really. We often want to think that words have power do because it is easier to not have to take responsibility for our own actions.
Abara Cadabra has the power to delight a child.
Yet if you say Crucio that kids won’t suddenly become racked with pain. (Harry potter reference)
Why doesn’t the unforgivable curse of Crucio not work? If words have power would they not exert the effect you want them to have?
What are words?
They are vibrations created by our mouth. They can sting if you let them. Or you can choose to not let words affect you
Remember Sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you.