How to Find Your Purpose

Reading Time: 8 minutes

Do you know what your purpose is? Maybe you have heard the age-old and you are asking yourself what is the reason you are placed on this earth? The sad part is that most people don’t know or don’t care. Those who are curious or dissatisfied enough do start down that path find ourselves on a long life journey. This journey transforms you from someone who is just working for the weekend to a person who doesn’t care what the day of the week is. That is because today is going to be the best day yet.

What? Does that sound a little farfetched? That is because you are just starting on the path of self-discovery, and that is awesome to know. This path is one of great transformation if you can stay on it that is. You will be tempted to give up. You may even hear yourself say this is stupid, or you may have a friend who coaxed you back to the comfort of your PlayStation. You may stop and leave the path. Yet if you get far enough down the road, you will not be able to stay off the path for long. You always find yourself back on path to find your purpose.

You do get lost from time to time you get so into the discovery that you stray from your purpose. Yet when you realize that you left your reason for getting out of bed behind you quickly drop all that you are doing and hurry back to your why.

Finding your purpose

Finding your purpose is one of those journeys that many people will travel literal 1000’s of miles only to find that their purpose and reason for being on this earth was either with them the whole time or at the starting line. So, are you ready? Do you want to go on a journey that will leave you a changed man? You will lose some friends but you will gain more friends in their place.

Your life purpose can be as daunting to you as to a child trying to climb stairs
Photo by Jukan Tateisi on Unsplash

You will find out that some members of your family will doubt you and talk about how you are on a fool’s errand. You will have to learn to forgive them for not understanding. You will come to understand that they don’t want to understand. You are accomplishing something they only dreamed of. Their lost dreams can be painful when they are disturbed. Therefore, you have to be ok with knowing that they don’t understand. Then try like the devil not to let them get to you. The person who may derail you could be your favorite uncle or your sweet Aunt Gladys. She is only trying to keep you from getting hurt.

So how do you find your purpose?

What are you passionate about?

Ok, let’s start with an easy one. What is your passion? Sounds easy right? We often miss diagnosing what we are passionate about.  The reason we often look at passions in the wrong way is that we look at what is the most glamorous, or we look at what is popular. Sometimes we see our passions in the wrong light. We will quickly dismiss our passions just because we can’t see the true value it brings to others.

What if your passion is model railroads? How is that a purpose you should pursue? There are several avenues you could explore maybe you love your G scale trains. So maybe you start working on helping younger people discover the joys of model railroading. You could be known as the model railroad guy. Will you make money with your passion? Maybe not it could grow no more than just a hobby. Then again, people could pay you for your advice and expertise if you are viewed as an expert on G scale railroads.

Some times searching for your purpose is like looking for a person from the observation deck
Photo by Eri J on Unsplash

You view your passion as being hidden. That only because you don’t think it is important. When in all reality it is what you are really looking for when you are searching for your purpose. So don’t discount your passions. You may not know how it fits into your life but it is important to you and it makes you who you are.

What are your Core Values?

You also want to look at what your core values are. This can help direct what direction your purpose is leading you. If educating others is, an important core value then showing people how to make the most realistic railcars could be a clue in your direction.

What do you like to talk about?

We all know about that one teach when you were in high school who you could easily derail if you mentioned a particular topic. For me, it was my science teacher, Mr. Dick. All you had to do is try to work cars into the topic and the class was done for the rest of the hour. He would even try to work cars into his lessons. Why? Well, his passion is cars. He would talk about any type of car there was. As I said, his cars were his passion.

Photo by Matthew Kalapuch on Unsplash

What do you like to talk about? What topic causes your eyes to light up? What new piece of info can you not wait to share? Do your friends avoid mentioning a particular topic? Many people are like that with politics, while other folks love to talk about a particular sports team. I myself like to talk about mindset. How it opens doors and possibilities. The power of a person’s mindset is the key to all their success and happiness.

So look at what you like to talk about. Maybe write down 5 different topics of discussions you like to converse over. You might be surprised at what you find.

What find you watch the most on YouTube?

When you first open up YouTube, there is a huge list of suggestions. What does that tell you? Mine is video games, primarily Red Dead Redemption 2 and self-help. Why? Because that is what the algorithm, notices that I tend to watch. I will click on a new and interesting RDR2 just about every time I open the site.

Therefore, I could go into video games as a passion because I do like video games. Yet I could also mix my passion for PlayStation games, and work the topic of mindset into the games. That way I am able to reach people who want to know about mindset and allow them to also watch me playing games horribly. This is actually something that is in the works.

So what do you like to watch on YouTube? Do you like watching wood carving videos? Maybe you are interested in how to draw or paint. This could be a clue as to what your interests and passions lie.

Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

What do you spend the most money on?

I hadn’t thought of this strategy until I watched the Monday video. What do you spend your money on? Do you spend most of your money on camping equipment, as I do? What are you willing to spend money on? This is a huge clue as to what your passion in life could actually be.

Once you examine your credit card statement, you can then start figuring out how this passion is tied to your purpose. Do you need to take men out into the woods so you can help them change their mindset? That is what I have deduced what my purpose and objective is.

What did you like to do when you were a kid?

Now, this is a huge clue to what your purpose is. Yet this is so often overlooked. What did you like to do as a kid? Yeah, you liked to ride your bikes and play with your friends but what was that one thing you really liked to do?

Photo by 童 彤 on Unsplash

I would often get people who looked like they are down to talk. I could get them to open up and express what the problem was. I remember talking to several other kids at church camp because they were going through some type of problem. I would get them to open up sometimes with a little needling. I like to help people. This is something I often go out of my way to do.

What did you like to do when you were a child? How about something you were very interested in when you were in your teens? Think back and you will see that there are clues in your childhood that show you what your purpose was to be. My son for another example is that you couldn’t keep him indoors. He had to be outside. Even when he was two, he would find ways to unlock the deadbolt so he could get outside. Then he always was happier when he was working outside. Now he is a commercial fisherman and I don’t think that boy could be happier.

What do your friends say you are good at?

This one harks back to finding your core values. Your close friends know you’re better than you know yourself. These guys will call your strengths and weaknesses as they see it. The good ones will even call you out when they see that you are not being true to yourself. You might even go as far as ask your friend the six hardest questions you will ever ask

  1. What are my 3-5 unique qualities?
  2. What Value do you get from connecting with me?
  3. What do you think is my professional strength?
  4. What do you think is my Personal Strength?
  5. What tribute is unique to me and separates me from others?
  6. What is one Quality that I seem to undervalue and you think I should be bolder about sharing?

Those questions can smart and will defiantly surprise you when you get those answers back. I would most assuredly ask your closest and dearest friends those questions to understand what your purpose is.

If you wrote your own obituary…

This may seem a bit morbid but hear me out. What if you wrote your own obituary? What would you want to be remembered for? What detail about your life would you want to remind people about? This is a huge clue as to your purpose. It can help point you in the right direction as to where you are supposed to go.

From here, you are able to start actually venturing out on your path. So what do you do to start on your path after you have laid out your clues?

How to start down the path

Now you can actually start a few different ways down your path. Many people just start in one way but many not are sure as to how to start.  Therefore, here are some ways you can start marching down the path that is your purpose in life

Have you made a mission statement?

Do you have a mission statement? If so look it over and see what you want to accomplish. If you have a mission statement then you are way ahead of someone who is just starting out. Jack Canfield talks about having a life purpose statement. Which, is a lot like a mission statement.

A mission statement is a good place to start if you believe you have found your passion and purpose. If you want to know how to create your mission statement then reading, what do your Missions can help? Then once you have your mission written you are well on your way to following your path.

Take up a cause. If you find that your clues point to a cause you can contribute to, then why not join the cause as long as it fits with your values. Those values are there to help you direct your path to ensure that you don’t stray away from your mission.

Take Responsibility

Your purpose should become your responsibility. This is where many men derive our sense of being and purpose from. So take pride in the responsibility of helping people to understand your path. Make sure your purpose is your responsibility.

Remember Fred the baker, he got up every morning to make the donuts because that was his responsibility. He received pride in his donuts because that is what his passion and calling were about the baked donuts.

What if you choose the wrong path?

Guess what you rarely going to get on the right path when you first start. So be prepared to choose the wrong path. That is a part of learning who you are. You may realize that you actually don’t have as much passion as you thought. Then again, there may be a detail of your passion you never realized when you first started. So eventually, you will need to change.

The key point to this is the moment you find out that path isn’t for you, start making the needed adjustments. Understand way. You may want to talk to your mastermind group if you have one. Hear what your friends have to say about making a change. Then when you have made the decision, act upon it. There is nothing worse than hanging on to something that you don’t care for longer than necessary. It is better to make a choice with conviction and be on your way in the new path.

So, find your purpose. This is you why. What gets you out of bed? When you find that, why follow it. This action will help you feel more accomplished and complete than any other task you could pursue.

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About Bryan Goodwin

I like being able to help people find their "why" and achieve the personal freedom they desire. Besides writing for Relaxed Male I also am a life coach. By helping men find the leader that is found in each and every one of us. I do this by encouraging men to get outdoors and find the balance they are missing. Realize that they need to be in contact with the outside as often as they can. It is not only good for them but for their families and relationships.

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