8 Things Controlling people Do to Control You

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Talking about control this week we all know that there are people out there who want to control others. They use several different types of techniques to achieve this.

Most controlling people have some form of codependency issues that they are facing. They have to have people to go along with their controlling ways.

Many times they use tactics that are used to manipulate you to think that you are of lower self-worth and self-esteem.


The controlling person questions why you are not better by making comments about who you are, who you see, and what you listen to. This is all designed to help them feel better than you.

Don’t like being questioned

They get upset because they feel as if you are attacking you. Now they do a good job of dodging the questions and redirecting these questions so that you feel dumb for not understanding the solution that they so clearly see. Which is to follow them.

Guilt Trips

They love to use your thoughts and the emotions that are generated from those thoughts so that you feel bad about trying to have your own thoughts and will.

No interest in your thoughts

Your thoughts maybe good but to a controlling person they really don’t care about what you think because in their mind they have a better idea than you.

They want to control other peoples lives

They like to make rules and opinions about how you and other people live their lives. IF you want to go run they will tell you why that is bad. If it isn’t their idea it isn’t worth trying.

Increase the gap

They start with love but then create distance. This is to make you feel as though you are always off balance.

Being yourself is not desirable

The controlling person wants to have full control over you. That means that if you like painting then painting is a horrible idea. If you like walking they will do what they can to convince you to not like walking.

The humiliation

They use humor often cutting snark as a means to control you. This is designed to make you feel bad and to change your ways.

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About Bryan Goodwin

I like being able to help people find their "why" and achieve the personal freedom they desire. Besides writing for Relaxed Male I also am a life coach. By helping men find the leader that is found in each and every one of us. I do this by encouraging men to get outdoors and find the balance they are missing. Realize that they need to be in contact with the outside as often as they can. It is not only good for them but for their families and relationships.

1 Comment

  1. Such an true honest post, it’s easy to see how all the little things add up to one big controlling situation

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